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Milking a Cow

Milk a cow - Lou Costello and Bud Abbott
Abbott and Costello’s milking a cow routine, done in the movie Ride ’em Cowboy as well as on television in the Colgate Comedy Hour TV series — where Lou misunderstand “udder” vs “other”
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Abbott and Costello loafing script

Bud Abbott and Lou Costello - the loafing skit
A classic Abbott and Costello routine, where Lou Costello misunderstands that by “loafing” — Bud Abbott means that he’s making loaves of bread in a bakery; not loafing around the house like Costello! Taken from their classic television series, The Abbott and Costello Show.
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I’ve got twenty, too – Abbott and Costello

I’ve got twenty, too – Abbott and Costello
This is a classic Abbott and Costello skit, relying on Lou Costello mistaking the phrase “twenty, too” for the number “twenty-two” — taken from the Abbott and Costello film, Rio Rita, where Bud and Lou are trying to divide forty pieces of fruit evenly between themselves …
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Two Tens for a Five – Abbott and Costello

Two Tens for a five routine, made famous by Bud Abbott and Lou Costello
Two Tens for a five routine, made famous by Bud Abbott and Lou Costello A classic Abbott and Costello routine, from their first movie, One Night in the Tropics, where Bud Abbott shows that he’s not above running a quick scam on his friend, Lou Costello, in order to make a few...
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Loan me 50 dollars – Abbott and Costello

Loan me 50 dollars - classic Abbott and Costello skit
Abbott and Costello skit – Loan me 50 dollars One of the classic Abbott and Costello routines, where Bud Abbott takes advantage of a common math mistake that we all make to fleece his pal, Lou Costello, out of all of his money.  The skit ends with a...
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Vitamin Skit – Abbott and Costello

The Vitamin Skit, with Abbott and Costello (note: this routine is taken from the Abbott and Costello radio show) Lou Costello: Hey Abbott! Bud Abbott: Costello what are you doing skipping around like that? Lou Costello: Oh you see me skippin’ eh? It’s the doctor’s orders. Bud Abbott: The doctor told you...
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I bet you that you’re not here – Abbott and Costello

I bet you that you’re not here—Abbott and Costello routine
I bet you that you’re not here—Abbott and Costello routine In the movie The Noose Hangs High, there’s a very funny routine, where Abbott and Costello are being guarded by a gangster—and Bud Abbott decides to bet their warden that Bud can prove that the gangster isn’t there!  It’s a classic...
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Abbott and Costello – Dyeing Routine

Abbott and Costello – Dyeing Routine
A classic Abbott and Costello routine from their radio show – where Bud Abbott is talking about his Uncle Herman who works in a dye factory, and Lou Costello confuses “dyeing” for “dying” — with minimal effort, it could be turned into a gospel ministry skit, at the end...
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Abbott and Costello – Watts and Volts

A classic Abbott and Costello routine, in the style of Who’s on First?, where Bud Abbott tries to explain electricity —  Watts and Volts — only to have Lou Costello think that he’s talking about What’s and Votes.   From their movie,  Who Done It? Interestingly, it was...
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