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Guess what creature I am?

A free clown skit for 2 talking clowns (could be rewritten for 2 silent clowns and a narrator) by Raynbow the Clown
Clowns: 2 (a white face & auguste, or any combination where 1 clown is ‘simpler’ than the other)
Props required: none

2 clown come on stage.  
Clown 1: (looking at Clown 2) Hey! I’ve got a new guessing game!
Clown 2 (gesturing at the audience): But what about them?
Clown 1: (turns and sees the audience) That’s okay, they can play too!
Clown 2: Okay, what’s the guessing game?
Clown 1: I act out the part of a creature, and you have to guess what I am.   Ready?
Clown 2: (nodding) Yes.
Clown 1: Okay, I’m a dog! (gets down on all fours, barking, scratching fleas, etc.)
Clown 2: But … you told me that you’re a dog.
Clown 1: (oblivious) That’s a good guess!   Now try this one – I’m a cat! (gets down on all fours, pantomimes being a cat, rubs against the legs of Clown 2, licks itself, etc.)
Clown 2: But you  told  me that you’re a cat!
Clown 1: Very good!   Now  this  time …
Clown 2: (interrupting) Wait a minute!   Your game would be a lot more fun if you  didn’t  tell me what you’re going to be!   Just act it out, and I can guess.
Clown 1: (acting as if a light has come on over his head, slowly beginning to understand) Ohhh …. just act it out?

Clown 2: (pleased) Yes!
Clown 1: (pleased as punch) Okay!   This time, I’ll be a duck!   (crouches down, curls his arms together and flaps them like wings, quacks, etc.)
Clown 2: (upset) Don’t you understand?   You don’t need to  tell  me what you are?   Just let me guess!
Clown 1: (sorrowful) Oh, I’m sorry.   Okay, guess this one. (Just stands there)
Clown 2: Hmm.   Are you a tree?
Clown 1: Nope.
Clown 2: Are you a rock?
Clown 1: No.   A living creature, remember?
Clown 2: (thinking hard) Something sleeping?
Clown 1: No.
Clown 2: I give up – what are you?
Clown 1: (triumphantly) A Christian.
Clown 2: (slightly  angry) But you weren’t doing anything!
Clown 1: (turns to face the audience) But that’s what a lot of Christians do – absolutely nothing.
(It might work better if the Pastor would say this last line, while the clowns walk off, and the Pastor can begin a sermon on faith leading to works, via the Epistle of James, etc. “Even so, faith, if it has not works, is dead, being alone.” – James 2:17)


Tom Raymond, aka. Raynbow the Clown, has been a professional clown and balloon twister for over 15 years, and runs several clown-related websites such as Famous Clowns, Best Clean Funny Jokes

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